::An engineering student to his sweeper brother:
I have got degree, I have got knowledge, I can
sit in society. What do you have? Sweeper: I
have the job.
::Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what
should we do? Husband: Let us stand in silence
for 2 minutes.
::Several women appeared in court, each accusing
the other of the trouble in the flat where they
lived. The judge called for orderly testimony. "I'll
hear the oldest first," he decreed. The case was
closed for lack of evidence.
::Getting married is very much like going to a
restaurant with friends. You order what you want,
then when you see what the other person has, you
wish you had ordered that.
::In a train, ticket checker to a saint: Ticket
please! Saint: I don't have. TT: Where do you
want to go? Saint: Lord Ram's birth place,
Ayodhya! TT: Come, lets go! Saint: Where? TT:
Lord Krishna'a birth place, Jail.
::Commerce professor asks the student: what is
the most important source of finance for
starting business? Student: "Father in law".
::Q. What's the difference between people who
pray in church and those who pray in casinos???
.
.
.
.
A. The ones in the casinos are serious...!!!
::Good news! A new way to send Romantic kiss to
your girlfriend. Just call me and order your
kiss. I will personally go and deliver it.
::Mon to Sun, From Jan To Dec, From birth till
my death, my feelings 4 u have never changed.
For me, you've always been a headache!
::A baby fish asked her mother: Y can't we live
on earth? Mother Fish: Earth is not the place
for FISH, it's made for selfish.
::Q: What’s the difference between a good lawyer
and a great lawyer? A: A good lawyer knows the
law. A great lawyer knows the judge.
:If I was an artist, you would be my picture! If
I was a poet, you would be my inspiration! If I
was an author you would be my story! But I'm
only a cartoonist!
::Boy: I am not rich like rohit, I don't even
have a bid car like rohit. But I really love you!
Girl: I love you too, but tell me more about
rohit..
::Dream makes everything possible, Hope makes
everything work, Luv makes everything beautiful,
Smile makes all the above... So always Brush ur
Teeth .
::Do u know similarity between Dinosaurs and
Decent Girls? Both don't exist.
::Monday went on Tuesday 2 Wednesday and asked
Thursday whether Friday has told Saturday that
Sunday is a holiday. Have a Great Sunday...
::An engineering student to his sweeper brother:
I have got degree, I have got knowledge, I can
sit in society. What do you have? Sweeper: I
have the job.
::Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what
should we do? Husband: Let us stand in silence
for 2 minutes.
::Several women appeared in court, each accusing
the other of the trouble in the flat where they
lived. The judge called for orderly testimony. "I'll
hear the oldest first," he decreed. The case was
closed for lack of evidence.
::Getting married is very much like going to a
restaurant with friends. You order what you want,
then when you see what the other person has, you
wish you had ordered that.
::Dad : Son, what do you want for your birthday?
Son : Not much dad, just a radio with a sports
car around it.
::A Love Letter from BISCUIT MAKER- Dear Marie,
Today is Good Day, U r Anmol for me... But U
have Crackjacked my Heart, Bcoz I have a Little
Heart, Now I m in 50/50 position...
:You = cute You = hot You = sweet
You = intelligent You = amazing You
= perfect Me = a great liar.
::True relatives always stand behind u during
bad times. Check ur marriage album.All your
relatives were standing behind u!
7 Proposal = 1 Marriage - And that 1 marriage
has 77777+ problems. So beware of glance.
::An englishman, bihari & punjabi were standing
on roof. They decided to throw down whatever was
available in excess with them. Englishman threw
pounds, Bihari threw rice & Punjabi threw the
Bihari down.
::Gal: Do u have any sentimental love cards?
Shopkeeper: How about this card, it says 'To the
only boy I ever loved'
Gal: Great! I want 10 of them.
:There is a sign in the toilet of the sex
change clinic. It reads: We may never piss this
way again.
::Lawyer: “What was the first thing your husband
said to you when he woke that morning?”Witness:
“He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’”
::Beauty is not how you look, it is not how
handsome u r, it is not ur figure too... Beauty
is the inner self, so change ur underwear daily.
::Always start your day with a lot of S E X ,S-mile
,E-nergy ,X-citement ,so make SEX a daily habit,
& u'll always be SMILING!
::Q: What did the gangster's son tell his dad
when he failed his examination? A: Dad they
questioned me for 3 hours but I never told them
anything."
::What's the difference between wife n
neighbours wife? Wife is a chocolate, can have
any time. Neighbour's wife is like an ice-cream,
shud hv immediately.
::It's the sweetest thing to do. Do it the bed,
on a sofa, in the bathroom or anywhere! U must
never stop doing it. It's called Prayer! God
bless ur naughty mind.
::Gal: Do u have any sentimental love cards?
Shopkeeper: How about this card, it says 'To the
only boy I ever loved'
Gal: Great! I want 10 of them.
::Choosing Career Is Like Choosing Wife From 10
GirlFriends.Even If U Pick Most Beautiful,Most
Intelligent,
Kindest Women,There”s Still Pain Of Loosing 9
::One out of four people is a chinese in this
world. If your father, your mother and your
brother are not Chinese, it must be you .
::The Police are looking for a suspect who is
smart, sexy, witty & very good looking... So
where are you gonna to hide Me?
::Im at the police station.The police caught me
& filed a case against me "possession of good
looks".i'm doomed! i need someone ugly 2 bail me
out-so hurry up!
::I have started luving 'U'... I know it sounds
rediculous but I can't control my feelings 4 'U'.
Some time later I'll start luving more ALPHABETS...!
::2day, 2mmorow & yesterday there will b 1 heart
dat would always beat 4 u…u know Whose???ur Own
Stupid!!!
::Hi i am marrying next week there will be a
small party and only few persons will be invited
Hey don't bring any gift
just bring SOMEONE to marry me.....
:: If marriages r made in heaven, den wat r made
in Hell? Ans : the days after marriage What a
married man says after years of marriage:- My
marriage is made of Trust & Understanding, she
doesn’t Trust me & I dont Understand her.
::Lawyer: “And why did that upset you?”Witness:
“My name is Mary.”
